The Fearless, Powerful Joy Revolution with Amy Dickens

Wendy & Rich 0:01
Coming to you from the Freedom Federal Credit Union studios, Hartford County living presents Conversations with Rich Bennett. 

What if

Rich Bennett 0:27
the thing you've been told is extra? The dancing, the laughter, the silliness, the play, is actually the doorway to your courage. What if joy isn't something you wait for after you've earned it? But something you practice your way into? My guest today once believed adulthood had to be serious, structured, and heavy. She battled social anxiety, depression, burnout, and a list of health struggles. She was playing it safe, living small, mistaking comfort for happiness. Then she did something most people only daydream about. She sold her things, tried van life, traveled the world as a yoga teacher, started leading playful workshops that got people laughing again. And now she hosts street joy parades, weekly dance parties where people literally move through their fear and into freedom. Today, we're talking with Amy Dickens, author of 101 Ways to Spread Joy, founder of Joyfully You, a podcast host, a speaker, and someone who believes joy isn't fluffy. It's fuel, fuel for courage, fuel for authenticity, fuel for changing your nervous system, and maybe even the world around you. How you doing, Amy? 

Amy Dickens 1:54
I'm doing so good. We've been having so much fun before we've impressed records. I'm like, this is just going to be great. 

Rich Bennett 2:02
Something I need to start doing, and it's funny because when I record in person, actually, I just did a recording yesterday, and the one lady was the first time she's ever been on a podcast as she was nervous. So I just hit record didn't tell them when we started. I need to start doing that with these, because sometimes those are the good bloopers too. 

Amy Dickens 2:22
I know I was thinking that I'm like, this is good material here. 

Rich Bennett 2:28
Yeah, never 

Amy Dickens 2:29
mind. I also believe in weed, that's great. 

Rich Bennett 2:34
Oh God. All right, so I went to, I'm looking forward to this. But when you think back to the version of you who was role, who was ruled by social anxiety and playing it safe, what was a normal day in your life like? 

Amy Dickens 2:53
You know, that's a great question. I've actually been reflecting on that a lot lately because somebody was like, what's your five year plan? And I was thinking five years into the future. And I was like, well, literally five years ago I was crying in the back of my van because I was so scared of talking to anybody at 

Rich Bennett 3:12
Wow. 

Amy Dickens 3:12
all. It's like the whole nervous system which is like, I don't know how to do this. It's like really scary. But for a long time, I mean, I've always kind of been like an achiever, like you know. 

Rich Bennett 3:22
Right. 

Amy Dickens 3:22
Like the good girl like at the A. So like I always had my job and my jobs tended to be with kids. So there was a lot of, there was a lot of interaction, a lot of speaking. So I, but they were with like, you know, people that were under four feet tall. 

Rich Bennett 3:38
No, they were like, oh my god. 

Amy Dickens 3:40
It was, it seemed like the anxiety would rise the taller person. 

Rich Bennett 3:46
If they scared me, I could just give them the boot. I mean. 

Amy Dickens 3:49
Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 3:51
All right. Oh, geez. 

Amy Dickens 3:54
So really I would be like, I think just use all the juice ahead of my tank to really get through the day often. And I would be like, you know, be like, oh my god. Just that's like kind of the noise. I think my nervous system is making internally. And then I'd get home. And I can remember for like a full year straight, I would get home, throw my bag on the ground and just like fully slap myself down on the couch and just cry because I was so overwhelmed all day by kind of like holding it all together. And like people would try and talk to me and all of a sudden I would just feel like I need to run to the bathroom. I don't even know what to do with all this. And I would just 

Rich Bennett 4:28
Wow. 

Amy Dickens 4:28
literally sit in the bathroom like hyperventilate because I was like, I don't know how to talk to people. I just going to hide in here until maybe they go away. I don't know. Where do I say or maybe 

Rich Bennett 4:36
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 4:36
I'll think of something to say and then I'll come back and say it. And then, oh, fuck, they're going to say something back and then I'd say some back to them. Yeah, there was just a lot of years of struggle and in the middle of that really trying to figure out my way out of it. You know, I was like 

Rich Bennett 4:51
the 

Amy Dickens 4:51
reading all the podcast taking all the courses being like there's gone to be a way out of this. And it, you know, is slowly getting better and better. But 

like an environmental educator. I was doing, um, social emotional stuff so like kind of the kids that needed a little extra attention and the school system kind of taken them to the side a lot of times or doing small groups kind of thing, doing all different kinds of jobs. 

Rich Bennett 5:37
Wait, you, a nanny? 

Amy Dickens 5:39
Yeah, it was a nanny for a while. 

Rich Bennett 5:41
Really? 

Amy Dickens 5:42
Yeah, it was a good time. 

Rich Bennett 5:44
I, you, just, was somebody with social anxiety, I would think that would, that would be the last thing on your mind's become being a nanny because you gotta talk with the parents, you know, taking kids to the playground to chuck 

Amy Dickens 5:58
Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 5:58
to cheese or whatever. 

Amy Dickens 6:00
You know, I mean, pretty much all of it was like, I don't wanna have to think so like, Ah, this is scary and I mean I gotta get paid so I guess I gotta. 

Rich Bennett 6:08
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 6:09
(laughing)

Rich Bennett 6:12
God. 

Amy Dickens 6:12
But I was really good with kids. Like I mean, I'm like a, I'm a goof mom. I was like, I think I was supposed to work with kids for so long. 

Rich Bennett 6:19
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 6:19
Like how to do that with adults. Cause now I'm like, oh my god, I just wanna activate adults into their inner children all the time. 

Rich Bennett 6:27
So, what was it that you, that finally, that light ball went off and you realized that there was more? 

Amy Dickens 6:37
Wow, I mean, I love when people have a story and they're 缩 titre playing) 

Rich Bennett 6:41
( 

Amy Dickens 6:41
you know what, Rich? I woke up this one day and the toast came out of the toaster and I saw the words written on there. You're meant for more and I was like, I knew it in that moment, you know? Like I wish I had that kind of like, aha. 

Rich Bennett 6:56
(laughing) 

Amy Dickens 6:57
I mean, in my story, I don't know, I know as anyone ever had their transformation written on toast I don't know where that came from but if you have, let me 

Rich Bennett 7:05
and, 

Amy Dickens 7:05
know, confined me. (laughing)

Rich Bennett 7:08
I think you may have seen the old story where somebody saw the piece of toast. I think it was on Ebay because when it came out of the toaster, it looked like mother, no not mother Teresa. 

Amy Dickens 7:18
I think that Jeep was on it. 

Rich Bennett 7:20
Yes, yes, you're okay, yes. Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 7:24
I think that's like, I was like, almost said. Jesus was on it and then I'm like, why am I saying this? Like, it doesn't even make sense in this story. 

Rich Bennett 7:30
(laughing) 

Amy Dickens 7:31
Okay, you got me. We were on the same wavelength already. 

Rich Bennett 7:35
Oh my God. 

Amy Dickens 7:36
(laughing)

It was never on my toast so we had 

Rich Bennett 7:41
It was on the, 

Amy Dickens 7:41
to wait. 

Rich Bennett 7:42
it was on the, it was in the jelly. (laughing) 

Jesus. 

All right, you got me losing it already. 

Amy Dickens 7:53
I'm not even listening to this. This is great, I'm like, it's not even 11 a. m. or I'm already like, we's laughing. This is a 

Rich Bennett 8:00
(laughing) 

Amy Dickens 8:00
good way to start the day. My cheeks already hurt. I'm like, I'm gonna need a moustache on my cheeks after this conversation. Gosh, what was your question even? What was the moment like? 

Rich Bennett 8:10
(laughing)

Amy Dickens 8:10
What even remember? 

Rich Bennett 8:15
The moment when the light bulb went off and you realize everything's gonna change. 

okay. 

Amy Dickens 8:21
Yeah, 

Rich Bennett 8:22
It wasn't the piece of toast, 

Amy Dickens 8:24
There was lots of light bulb moments. I'd say there was a, like, I'm not even kidding. When I say there was like eight years of like continual little like blips of, oh, 

Rich Bennett 8:33
right? 

Amy Dickens 8:33
something's got to change and then you know, it would kind of motivate me and then I just kept sliding back kind of thing. But there was a continuous flicker of hope that whole time I was struggling. It gets so much better and kind of this blind faith that I have literally no idea how. I have genuinely zero freaking idea how I get from point A to B, but I know that there is some delusional way to get there and I don't even really know what point B is. I don't know what better is, where it is, what 

Rich Bennett 9:02
like. 

Amy Dickens 9:02
it looks 

Rich Bennett 9:03
Right. 

Amy Dickens 9:03
I get there. I'm just gonna keep throwing spaghetti at the wall and I'm gonna see what sticks and I know at some point I'm gonna land and somewhere better than this is basically where I was at for a long time. So I was just, yeah, I think in like a very experimental like seeking solutions phase for a long time and very like in my head about it of like, oh my god, this has got to get better. But there was a moment now that you say that the day before the whole country shut down with COVID. 

Rich Bennett 9:32
Mmm. 

Amy Dickens 9:33
I was working at a school and there was a kid, um, biting this arm and there was another kid on this side that's trying to get to this kid and I'm like pushing these kids away from each other so they don't just like, absolutely, you know, like attack each other. I was like, I don't know what is going on and they were kindergarten. They were just having a moment. They were, you know, like, two five year olds that I don't know. I wasn't even there for, like, the incident that caused the amount of anger, I just got the walkie talkie called like, Amy were gonna need some resistance over here in the room K-2 over here and I'm like, alright, I'm over there! Let's go! I'm like, oh, wow, you guys really need some help, okay, I got it. Um, Amy's gonna need some backup. But work had been very stressful like that. Like, there was just a lot of, we were understaffed, I think, for the amount of like, 

Rich Bennett 10:20
right, 

Amy Dickens 10:21
years and children in that school. So I'm like, trying to keep these kids away from each other. I remember looking up at the ceiling and like saying to myself, "God, I don't know how, give me out of this!" And then the next day, the whole country shut down. And I was like, "Whoa, if you care for me, which story?" 

Rich Bennett 10:38
So it was your fault. 

Amy Dickens 10:40
This is my fault, this is exactly where we're going with this. No, but that actually was such a blessing for me because, 

Rich Bennett 10:48
yeah. 

Amy Dickens 10:48
For the first time in my whole life, all of the social needs, like, to show up in the world went away. Like, it was always, like, the opposite. It was, like, don't see anyone actually. Like, stay at least six feet away from everyone and all of everything is closed. So you can't go anywhere and you can't talk to anybody except for your boyfriend that you live with, which you're perfectly fine talking to him and your cat. And something about the space that I got in those few weeks felt like it kind of started to transform me. It was like, whoa, I wasn't just running on, like, *haha* all the time. 

Rich Bennett 11:21
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 11:21
I literally remember turning to my boyfriend at the time and saying, "Let's sell everything and move into a van!" What do you say? I've been, like, watching these YouTube videos for whatever reason for the last six years about to, like, build it and, like, let's just do it!" And he's like, "Okay." 

Rich Bennett 11:36
--"Wait...." 

Amy Dickens 11:37
And He's dead it. 

Rich Bennett 11:38
Were you guys renting a place or were you purchasing? 

Amy Dickens 11:41
Yeah, so we were renting a place in 

Rich Bennett 11:43
Okay. 

Amy Dickens 11:44
Portland, Oregon, or were at the time, which is, like, a ridiculous amount of rent. And we were like, "Wow, everything we love about this city just, like, shut down overnight. Why are we paying, like, an absurd amount of money in our lease is ending? Like, why not just sell it all and go into a van?" Like, let's just try something different. 

Rich Bennett 12:04
Alright, now, when you say a van, because 

Amy Dickens 12:07
Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 12:07
I'm old, and I'm thinking of, you know, the old vans when you say, "Fuck the vans all the time," so what kind of vans you're talking about? Not a minivan. 

Amy Dickens 12:17
No, not a minivan. Some people do do the minivan life, and more power to them. We had, like, one of those, like, talls for an or van kind of things. 

Rich Bennett 12:26
Okay. 

Amy Dickens 12:26
So, a van, but, like, you can stand up in it, and 

Rich Bennett 12:29
like --"Yeah." 

Amy Dickens 12:29
we had Look at that and, like, a little booth that we could both sit at kind of thing, and we had our cat 

Rich Bennett 12:35
So you 

Amy Dickens 12:35
and --"Okay. 

Rich Bennett 12:35
basically turned it into, like, an RV. 

Amy Dickens 12:38
Yeah, basically, we built 

Rich Bennett 12:39
Wow." 

Amy Dickens 12:39
out, which was the whole journey in itself. We had never really picked up tools before, and we were like, "Why not?" 

Rich Bennett 12:44
God. 

Amy Dickens 12:45
Build a van out. That seems easy. It's not easy. It's really hard. It's really, really hard. 

Rich Bennett 12:55
You guys did that going COVID? 

Amy Dickens 12:59
Yeah. So we were just, like, going around, exploring around. I just -- yeah, I think that was, like, kind of the beginning of the journey of, like, "Wow. Let's follow this joy." Like, "What is it?" I'm so good. I was so good at doing what I thought I should do. Like, what do 

Rich Bennett 13:15
Right. 

Amy Dickens 13:15
I think other people want from me? What's, like, how do I make everyone else happy but it ain't me, and then I was like, "I'm going to flip the script. I'm going to sit through this incredible uncomfortable season." Oh, I can feel that, like, maybe they want me to do that, and I'm going to do this. I want to sell everything. I'm going to move into a van. I'm going to follow my joy. Whatever that looks like, and be really freakin' uncomfortable with it. And face my freakin' fears finally, rather than letting the fears kind of be in the driver's seat. You know, because I think that there's a difference between, like, "I am feeling terrified all the time before versus I'm actively facing my fear face on." And realizing, actually, it's not that scary on the other side of it. Like, it takes the power away from it. 

Rich Bennett 14:01
All right. If you don't mind me asking because you're from Chicago, right? 

Amy Dickens 14:05
-- Chicago. So we 

Rich Bennett 14:06
So 

Amy Dickens 14:06
home Chicago. 

Rich Bennett 14:07
Go Black Hawks. So what pulled you from Chicago to Portland, Oregon? Or was there something in between there? 

Amy Dickens 14:15
Oh, no, that was that was a good one. We went from Chicago to Portland. I had been wanting to go to Portland for a long time and my boyfriend was in Chicago. And so I didn't go to school in Portland. And I was like, I'm in love. We're going to stay here. And actually it was a good move because we ended up being together for like 11 years. So, 

Rich Bennett 14:35
wow. 

Amy Dickens 14:35
It actually did. I know. I know. Right. Who would have thought the high school boyfriend? It did work out. For quite some time. 

Rich Bennett 14:44
Wait, you said it didn't work out. 

Amy Dickens 14:47
It did. Well, it 

Rich Bennett 14:48
I would 

Amy Dickens 14:48
did. And now it's, you know, like prepare 11 years. I feel like 11 years is a good stint. You know, 

Rich Bennett 14:54
yeah. It is 

Amy Dickens 14:55
before that I'm like, y'all got married and divorced. I mean, we never did that whole situation, but 

Rich Bennett 15:01
said it's 

Amy Dickens 15:02
I 

Rich Bennett 15:02
like you and COVID both you and him are putting his van together. And then you start traveling country. 

Amy Dickens 15:09
Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 15:10
Which 

okay. This is pretty wild because during COVID, you're traveling in the country and everything we shut down. 

Amy Dickens 15:18
Yeah, 

Rich Bennett 15:19
it had to be hard because there were a lot of places you couldn't go into. 

Amy Dickens 15:23
Yeah, it was, it was challenging. It was definitely challenging. I mean, by the time that we ended up actually like finishing the build. 

Rich Bennett 15:29
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 15:30
you know, being on the road, because we just, it took a lot longer than we thought it would. You know, things are like somewhat opened up again. But you know, it was hard to meet people also because everybody's like, "Oh, you gotta stay far 

Rich Bennett 15:45
Yeah, 

Amy Dickens 15:45
away from everyone." 

Rich Bennett 15:49
Wow, what was the scariest part of that? 

Amy Dickens 15:53
I mean, there was different types of scary. I'd say in the van was when I've faced the most like intense fear in some ways. Like we got a flat tire going up a mountain in glies. 

Rich Bennett 16:06
Oh, no. 

Amy Dickens 16:06
A part. And we like, by the grace of God, there was a parking lot, literally five feet in front of us when we got the flat tire. And then somebody comes up and he's like, "Yeah. So you got to make sure you done it right. I know you've never changed a flat tire." But if you do it wrong, this van will fly off the mountain with your cat and all of your belongings in it. 

Rich Bennett 16:29
Oh, wow. 

Amy Dickens 16:30
I don't know how to do this. I don't have cell service to like YouTube, how to do this, like literally, this is my nightmare. 

There was times like that that are really scary. I was so exploded in the middle of 

Rich Bennett 16:47
what? 

Amy Dickens 16:47
There's like the driest place on the planet and we're like, "Oh my God. I literally had like the fire extinguisher out." And I'm like, "Pfft, just try not to start a wildfire." So there was like some, you know, I take those for the most, like, "Oh my God, I'm actually fearing for my life." Kind of moments. 

Rich Bennett 17:06
All right, that was a scariest part, which now I understand why you tell people don't build it yourself by a van that's already got the stuff in it. now? 

Amy Dickens 17:18
What are these A little bit, you 

Rich Bennett 17:20
But 

Amy Dickens 17:20
know. 

Rich Bennett 17:20
what, wait, during that time, would actually surprise you the most about yourself? 

Amy Dickens 17:29
Wow. Well, at some point, me and my ex got really like, "Wow. This is just the two of us in our cat and a van for nine months already." This is a lot. And so we were like, "Let's try and shake this up." We're kind of like in this van thing, but it feels like we need maybe other people in our 

Rich Bennett 17:49
Right. 

Amy Dickens 17:49
world to connect with. So we discovered that there's like, "Well, thing is what we call it." So it's basically, you get a work exchange and you volunteer as like a farmer or, you know, that kind of thing. So 

Rich Bennett 18:01
Oh, 

Amy Dickens 18:01
we're like, "Yeah, 

Rich Bennett 18:01
okay. 

Amy Dickens 18:01
like living in community with other people doing the same thing." And let's just see what happens. And so we show up to the first one in Northern California. And that's where I was like, "Wow. This is terrifying for me." I was like, "I do not know how to interact with people." I spent the first three days literally like having little moments of sitting around the table and like eating dinner or something. And then I would just need to like slowly silently remove myself pretending I'm going to the back room and I would just sit in the back of my van and cry. And I pretty much spent the first three days doing that, just in like, "I remember being like, wow, I don't know how I'm going to last the full month that I committed to here because I don't know how to do this." And I was just like asking for jobs where I didn't need to be with other people because I was just like, "I 

Rich Bennett 18:48
Right. 

Amy Dickens 18:48
don't know how to do this." And something in the, "Okay, well, I'm here for 30 days. I committed to this thing." I got to like, and I'm kind of like, "Once I commit, I usually, like, I stick to a thing. I'm that kind of person." 

Rich Bennett 19:00
Mm-hm. 

Amy Dickens 19:01
And something in being like, "Wow. I'm in this container with these people. I'm like stuck in this fish bowl, so to speak." and they were so sweet and they were so loving and it was just kind of that loving presence from these people that kind of cracked me open and before I knew it like day four day five day six I'm already starting to see oh this goofball Amy that is normally for a very select few people like on my hand probably at the time I could count but people in the world that would like see that version of me started to come out and she was just feeling much more confident in that sense of that fear of not belonging I think was really what it 

Rich Bennett 19:44
like 

Amy Dickens 19:44
was and I was 

Rich Bennett 19:45
right yeah 

Amy Dickens 19:45
I'm gonna why belong here because I kind of choose to belong here and it kind of that cracked the open the beginning of a journey of realizing belonging isn't something that somebody else kind of hands to you it's it's really I decided to belong here and I can kind of start to act in that kind of way and and heal the wounds inside of me that are seeking for it from other people kind of thing that makes sense and yeah although it was the beginning of whoa there is something underneath the surface bubbling up here 

Rich Bennett 20:20
so when you look back now do you think the van life was actually about travel or more about identity 

Amy Dickens 20:32
oh I totally think it's about identity really I 

Rich Bennett 20:35
yeah 

Amy Dickens 20:35
mean I'm I'd love to travel but all of my travels I really tend to see them kind of like a cocoon almost like it almost feels like it puts me into this like whoa you're I mean so the caterpillar goes into the cocoon and at some point you can like smear it on your arm like literally like in the cocoon it's like just goo and then I've been somehow that turns into a butterfly I don't even understand 

Rich Bennett 20:59
yeah 

Amy Dickens 21:00
that happens but that kind of feels like what was happening to me like the version of me before and the form of me after are two very different things and it was like that van was a literal cocoon I think of transformation to something that was like oh 

Rich Bennett 21:13
well 

Amy Dickens 21:14
I didn't know what was going to happen 

Rich Bennett 21:17
just just talking to you and those of you listening this is the first time Amy and I have met um but yeah just watching everything that you on your tiktoks and your Instagram you would never expect that this is the person that you're explaining from back then 

Amy Dickens 21:38
yeah 

Rich Bennett 21:39
you 

Amy Dickens 21:39
absolutely 

Rich Bennett 21:40
just who 

Amy Dickens 21:40
I feel I just feel so passionate about sharing that story because people assume they literally I think assume that was born with like a microphone in my hand they're like they see 

Rich Bennett 21:48
right 

Amy Dickens 21:48
me on the streets just like getting people like I'm literally wearing like a rainbow costume or something and I'm just like all right let's all do the macaerat or something ridiculous and they're like oh wow you I mean no believe me you don't have to be at where I'm right now but the small steps towards it if you want to be more like this is how you kind of become a new version of yourself 

Rich Bennett 22:10
you just gave 

Amy Dickens 22:10
so 

Rich Bennett 22:10
me 

Amy Dickens 22:11
possible 

Rich Bennett 22:11
you just gave me flashbacks we said macaerena because I was a DJ for years and that's after while we got tired of playing the macarena and the eletrics it's like oh god really I'd rather play the Hoki Poki I 

Amy Dickens 22:30
I'm become a sucker for those dances were 

Rich Bennett 22:33
people I 

Amy Dickens 22:35
think help people feel safe they're like oh I know the macaerena this one I can 

Rich Bennett 22:40
do it too that one it's 

Amy Dickens 22:43
for when

Rich Bennett 22:44
it is because I mean we retired from DJ in a few years ago but it's funny how those songs will still get people up and they'll they'll just have a blast they'll have a good time we did I was DJing it was a rock thing like old 80s rock that's all it was that's let me rephrase that that's all it was supposed to be like they'll only be whole people wanted to ask for that I guess they didn't know how to headbang maybe that's what it was 

Amy Dickens 23:20
I mean so much head banging one can do with the older I get I'm like I'm only 32 so I can't even I'm like I can't really have a very much anywhere I'm like yeah 

Rich Bennett 23:28
yeah 

Amy Dickens 23:29
it's my head 

Rich Bennett 23:29
made my hair fall out I 

Amy Dickens 23:36
should be a warning on the head banging box 

Rich Bennett 23:39
she got at Chicago to Portland California how'd you get out the Asheville I don't even say by the van 

Amy Dickens 23:48
no no no no so I ended up breaking up with that um boyfriend that I was with for 11 years uh 

Rich Bennett 23:56
we'll wait a minute hold up back up a 

Amy Dickens 23:58
minute yep 

Rich Bennett 23:59
all right so 

Amy Dickens 23:59
yep 

Rich Bennett 24:00
this was in California when you guys okay 

Amy Dickens 24:01
California! 

I wish I had a map for you. 

Rich Bennett 24:07
How in the world did that play with your mental health with everything you were going through? 

Amy Dickens 24:13
You know, it was a really fascinating moment, because we were planning our wedding at the wedding dress. I was like, 

Rich Bennett 24:20
wow. Woah! 

Amy Dickens 24:22
great person. He's really great. Um, so excited to spend the rest of my life with him. And then I think because of this transformation that I had been going through, I fell in love with, and he used to always say to me, he would say, 'Amy, I feel like my life mission is for you to love yourself and to see that you are as great as I see you.' And there was a moment where I like fell in love with myself and I was like, 'Whoa, I can see it.' 

Rich Bennett 24:46
That's a 

Amy Dickens 24:46
And he was almost like a flip-switched, and I was like, 'Whoa, you're really great, but I don't think you're my person anymore, something.' 

Rich Bennett 24:54
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 24:55
And it was just like, like a light switch. I was like, 'Wow, I don't know what I got to do, but I got to, I got to call it quits here.' And as he said, 'E-Pray love my way around the world.' 

Rich Bennett 25:08
But you know what, that's important. 

Amy Dickens 25:10
It wasn't wrong. It's exactly what I did. 

Rich Bennett 25:12
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 25:12
It was a little like, 'I'm not gonna do that,' and that's exactly what I did. I literally E-Pray loved my way around the world pretty much if you familiar with the movie. 

Rich Bennett 25:22
No. So now you guys explain it. 

Amy Dickens 25:25
Okay, it's a popular movie from like 10, 15 years ago, also a book, and this woman basically goes through a divorce and travels by herself into like a couple different countries. She just rediscofer who she really is! And she goes to Bali, and she goes to all these other places that I wanted to. And I was like, 'Wow, so I really did that for a year and rediscovered who I am.' 

Rich Bennett 25:47
So you traveled the country? I mean, not the country. You traveled the world? 

Amy Dickens 25:51
I did. Yeah. I was in Guatemala and Costa Rica. I was in Hawaii. I was in Mexico. I was in Bali. I was so skinny. I was going all around the world. 

Rich Bennett 26:02
Let me issue this then because, and we've talked about this a lot on the podcast, and I do believe that a lot of people don't know how to love themselves. 

Amy Dickens 26:13
Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 26:13
How long did it take you? Once I was said to you, how long did it take you to realize that you really do love yourself? 

Amy Dickens 26:22
I mean, it's a journey, you know? I think that I had that moment before that breakup of, oh, like it was almost like, I was aware that there was a good door to self love maybe, and that door opened and-- 

Rich Bennett 26:36
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 26:37
I kind of walked through it a little bit and then they, 'Oh, I don't know!' And I mean, I'd say just recently, I feel really freaking, like, unshakable grounded. I really do love myself and feel a sense of, I feel really worthy. 

Rich Bennett 26:53
really-- 

Amy Dickens 26:53
I 

Rich Bennett 26:53
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 26:53
feel Enough? And like, not that I'm perfect, I don't have my moments in my-- I think we all, probably 'til the end of time, have those human moments, and we're like, 'ah, I'm so sad!' Oh, I wish I was laughable, like, 'Oh, wait, no, it's just a little human moment we're having here.' But yeah, it's not a linear journey, I'd say, but it's-- 

Rich Bennett 27:14
Right. 

Amy Dickens 27:15
One that's so worth 

Rich Bennett 27:17
it. Okay, so, was there, like any particular book or anything that you read that helped you as well? 

Amy Dickens 27:27
Wow. I mean, there's so many books that I 

Rich Bennett 27:31
Oh, 

Amy Dickens 27:31
would-- 

Rich Bennett 27:31
there are, I know. 

Amy Dickens 27:32
There's so many. Like, literally, and then this was more before the van. I was reading, like, when I was, like, living in an apartment before we moved into vanna. I think I was reading, like, 90 books a year. Something crazy, like, a lot of them audiobooks, because I would just, like, you know, 

Rich Bennett 27:48
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 27:48
I-- 

Rich Bennett 27:49
So good at, you 

Amy Dickens 27:49
I 

Rich Bennett 27:50
know. 

Amy Dickens 27:50
like that, but yeah, and most of those being self-help books, a couple, you know, being just like fiction books, but yeah. So I was just like-- I'm sorry, all the information that I possibly could have, like, 'how can I be a computer?' But how do I figure out my purpose? That was one of the main ones as well. It was less-- I was less concerned with loving myself with my 20s, and I was more concerned with what the heck am I here to do and what are my gifts? And what is my purpose? Like, ah! I don't think I figured it out. And I was trying to bring my way there, and he was like, ah, maybe-- 

Rich Bennett 28:23
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 28:24
So if I, like-- my calculations will understand this is exactly what Amy Dickens is here to do. I'm like, no, that's not really the way that you get to your purpose often is I don't know, thinking your way. Do it, especially when your purpose is something like this. I'm like, I'm not a freaking rocket scientist. I'm not going to, I don't know, be like calculus or something weird like that. I mean, I'm over here, the lady leaving joy for me to the street. I'm going so blue calculus here. And the f-- People in NASA all just like looked up and they're like, oh, brother. 

Rich Bennett 29:01
Actually I'm good, I'm glad you brought them up, the Joy Parades, 'cause those started in the Asheville, right? Or did they start somewhere else? 

Amy Dickens 29:14
Oh. 

Rich Bennett 29:15
The Joy Parades. 

You go out, you buy this little wagon, I'm sure. And then you put all that you get to ban or what triggered the idea of these Joy Parades? Oh, you're going to love the next question I ask you, but what triggered all the Joy Parades, 'cause I -- And it was it -- like I guess you would say the pop-up dances or whatever. 

Amy Dickens 29:54
Yeah, yeah, well, there's like two different parts of it. One. 

Rich Bennett 29:59
Okay. 

Amy Dickens 30:00
During COVID, uhm, we visited home in the van, and it was like a blizzard, so we got stuck there for like a month. 

Rich Bennett 30:06
Oh 

Amy Dickens 30:07
And 

Rich Bennett 30:07
god, 

Amy Dickens 30:07
I was kind of losing it, so I would go on these dance walks out in, like, outside, and I've always loved dancing. 

Rich Bennett 30:15
right, 

Amy Dickens 30:15
And I would go on these walks, 'cause everybody else was stuck in the house, and I was kind of losing it. And I would put my headphones on, and I would just dance down the street, like nobody was watching. And I was having so much fun. It was like the 

Rich Bennett 30:31
good. 

Amy Dickens 30:31
highlight of my entire winter, was going on these walks every day, where I would just put on my headphones, and just like dance it out, with all those, like, two feet of snow around me. I'm like, what the heck? Like who is this lady doing that? And I just didn't stop doing that. I was just like, I love doing this. Fast forward, probably four, four and a half years. I'm still doing it all the time, and then like, kind of tell people about it, 'cause it's just a fun, quirky thing I do. It spreads a lot of joy. 

Rich Bennett 30:56
It does, yeah. 

Amy Dickens 30:57
I love it the most. And then I find out that my best friend here in Asheville just recently started doing that, like, in the timeline. And what? You started doing that too? I also do that! Where does? Too weird, painful. And I had been wanting to do a flash mob for years. 

Rich Bennett 31:17
Yeah, 

Amy Dickens 31:17
And I was really struggling because everybody said, "I want to show up for the flash mob, but I do not want to dig any time beforehand to learn dance." I was like, "Well, we're going to synchronize dance. We can't just magically show up and know how to 

Rich Bennett 31:28
no. 

Amy Dickens 31:28
do it." Like, we got to practice. So I was like, "Okay, I just want to dance and sync with people." So I'm like, "How the heck do I do this?" So low and behold me and my best friend were just like, "Let's get a speaker." And it started out with a tiny little dink of a speaker that I just connected to my fanny pack. And you could barely hear the music the first I'm like, "This is not going to work." And it's like flopping around, and it's like falling on the ground. I'm like, "This is a hot mess, but I'm a big fan of start. Just start. Like, you're 

Rich Bennett 32:00
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 32:00
never... You'd be like, "Ready, so just like get in. You know, you figure out a long way. I'm 

Rich Bennett 32:04
failing." 

Amy Dickens 32:04
still 

Rich Bennett 32:04
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 32:05
long way. I'm like, "Okay, let's just do some simple moves." And we had like a crappy little microphone like the Britney kind of headset that went that's like, "I'll crack a leap cutter thing." And we were just like, "All right, like those invite people to whoever shows up, we're going to get them dancing down the street." And we were just doing it, and we had showed up every, 

Rich Bennett 32:25
A 

Amy Dickens 32:25
you know, time and just to keep doing it. And then we got the big speaker, and we got them, and we were like, "Well, we need a wagon, because we can't just carry a big speaker." And then, you know, like, "Oh, people just need a flag." So people know what we are. So, you know, just kind of... 

Rich Bennett 32:37
...just 

Amy Dickens 32:38
evolve over time. 

Rich Bennett 32:41
So, you guys are still doing all that. The Joy parade and all. 

Amy Dickens 32:45
Oh, completely. Yeah. We just had one on Saturday. It was great. 

Rich Bennett 32:48
Really? 

Amy Dickens 32:48
With a dollar a big time, yeah. 

Rich Bennett 32:50
How many people usually get to take part in this? They ended up just joining in, 

Amy Dickens 32:58
Yeah. We have like a crew, I'd say of like usually 10 to 15 that start and end with us. You know, they're like, 

Rich Bennett 33:05
right? 

Amy Dickens 33:05
"I show up in the Joy parade." But it... I mean, it depends also on like the day, you know? If it's like a not a good weather day, it's like less people. But, you know, like last week, we probably had probably 50 people at one point just doing like the limbo outside 

Rich Bennett 33:18
That 

Amy Dickens 33:18
downtown. 

Rich Bennett 33:18
is awesome. 

Amy Dickens 33:19
Yeah. And it is so fun. You know, you just get people just doing silly little dances here and there. I mean, it's just so fun to get people to dance for even like two minutes on the middle of a day. Then you're like, "What is happening?" And before they know it, I'm like putting like a ribbon in their hand and they're like, "Okay, let's do it." 

Rich Bennett 33:38
I needed you at some of these events. I was DJ and 

Amy Dickens 33:41
Oh, 

Rich Bennett 33:41
G. 

Amy Dickens 33:42
please. I have thought many a time. I used to have in my mind. I'm like, I think people could easily hire me for events and weddings to like... 

Rich Bennett 33:50
Oh yeah. Oh 

Amy Dickens 33:52
Cause 

Rich Bennett 33:52
yeah. 

Amy Dickens 33:53
they're just gonna need someone to start at some point. That breaking point is what you really need. 

Rich Bennett 34:00
You're listening in the conversations with Rich Bennett. We'll be right back. 

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Tell them Rich and Chris sent you. All right, so Amy. 

I can't 

Amy Dickens 35:26
it. 

Rich Bennett 35:26
believe 

Amy Dickens 35:26
What are you asking me? 

Rich Bennett 35:29
Wait, but first of all, before I asked the question, then, and then people will understand why I'm asking the question. Tell everybody where they can follow you. 

Amy Dickens 35:39
Yeah. You can follow me livejoyfullyu.com is my website. You can get the first 10 pages to my book for free there. And just kind of see all the ridiculous things I'm doing. I'm starting an adult summer camp this year. So 

Rich Bennett 35:53
Nice. 

Amy Dickens 35:53
if you want to find out more about that, it's going to be a really fun fricking time. Or if you're into social media, be Amy Dickens. That's where you can find me on. 

Rich Bennett 36:01
So how many different wigs do you have? 

Amy Dickens 36:09
Not 

enough. Not enough. It's the honest answer is not enough. Only three. 

Rich Bennett 36:17
have 

Amy Dickens 36:17
I only 

Rich Bennett 36:17
no way. Do you call it what do you do? Color your hair? 

Amy Dickens 36:23
No, I just have I have a I'm looking at right now. So I'm looking over here. 

Rich Bennett 36:26
I got a okay 

Amy Dickens 36:27
wig. I got a hot pink wig that was just gifted to me and then I got like a muted pink wig. Just the three. And 

Rich Bennett 36:33
Oh, 

Amy Dickens 36:34
then I 

Rich Bennett 36:34
you 

Amy Dickens 36:34
got 

Rich Bennett 36:34
got to 

Amy Dickens 36:34
this. 

Rich Bennett 36:34
get a fire wig. 

Amy Dickens 36:35
My normal hair. This is not a wig 

Rich Bennett 36:38
fire wig. So those of you listening, yeah, when you go to her socials and see the dances. I'm like. All right, this woman's got to be wearing waist because there ain't no way in hell somebody changes their hair color that much, unless you're my 

Amy Dickens 36:53
No. 

Rich Bennett 36:53
son's fiance. But. 

I saw those like. Wow, I then from short hair to long hair. It's like yeah, that can't that can't be real. 

Amy Dickens 37:08
No. It's not. It's not. It's really. So it's really fun though. It's really good time. Also a life hack. If you're having a bad hair day, use your wig on and it's an instant. Good hair day. 

Rich Bennett 37:21
Maybe that's what I need to do. 

Amy Dickens 37:22
That's what I was going to say. I didn't want to say it, but I was thinking I'm like, you were very, like, me a little You just try the hot blue wig on, you know. 

Rich Bennett 37:32
Wow, thanks, Amy. 

Amy Dickens 37:35
It was $15 on Amazon, so. 

Rich Bennett 37:39
Yeah, I know so 

Amy Dickens 37:40
affordable life hack. 

Rich Bennett 37:41
I'm not. I'm not a wig guy. I we I'm at the Lions Club here years ago. We did a ugly waitress spaghetti dinner. We're all the guys dressed up as waitresses. 

Amy Dickens 37:52
Oh, I love 

Rich Bennett 37:53
it. Yeah, and I had the long Brunette wig on. No, 

Amy Dickens 38:00
no, no. 

Rich Bennett 38:00
no, 

Amy Dickens 38:00
I 

Rich Bennett 38:01
no, 

Amy Dickens 38:01
think, 

Rich Bennett 38:01
no, 

Amy Dickens 38:04
I don't know, I don't know if that's a compliment. 

Rich Bennett 38:07
I don't. So the fun is because all of us guys decided, let's make it a competition and whoever raises the most tips. Yeah, we'll we'll give that money to whatever charity they pick. Yeah. And my best friend won. And he was ugly. 

Yeah, Billy, I'm calling. Yeah. He's even ugly with. I think you cheated. He brought in a bunch of people. But yeah, let me tell you so when you get a bunch of guys to dress. Now, the ones that do it, you know, like the drag queen stuff, they're pros. They know what they're doing. When you get guys that don't know what we're doing, oh my God, it was scary. Yeah, we it was very, very. We were scary looking. 

W-well, we know we were, because we didn't have guy, any guys, come up and ask us if they wanna go out and.. 

oh my god, I forgot where I was completely going with this 

Amy Dickens 39:10
You're-you're 

Rich Bennett 39:10
now. 

Amy Dickens 39:11
asking me how many wigs I had. 

Rich Bennett 39:12
Oh, yeah, that's right, that's right. Ok, so-o-hey, god. You love spread and joy, 

Amy Dickens 39:19
love. 

Rich Bennett 39:19
which I 

Amy Dickens 39:19
I do! It's my favorite thing in the world. 

Rich Bennett 39:22
Did you ever think you were gonna be doing this? You know, and I'm going back to, like, back in Portland and everything. 

Amy Dickens 39:29
No, not even a little. I think about that all the time, where I can, like, picture myself, I would go to this one coffee shop, and I would have this, like, stack of books. And they were all about, like, figure out your purpose and your gift. And, like, what are you here to do? And I would, like, have my notebooks and I'd be, like, turn in the pages, and I'm undewinding things and I'm, like, trying to, like, get the map of, like, What is Amy here to do? Do I have a gift? I think I'm born without them. Oh, I think I'm one of those unlucky, purposeless people on this planet. And lo and behold, it's what I never--it wasn't even, like, on my radar of, I don't know, standing around and spreading joy to people. I didn't even really know how to do it to myself. Which is, I mean, really where it starts, you know. 

Rich Bennett 40:12
Right. 

Amy Dickens 40:13
It's, like, is, just, "Friend joy to yourself," and kind of, same with leading people. You gotta be able to lead yourself before you can lead other people 

Rich Bennett 40:19
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 40:20
in any kind of capacity. And yeah, I--I mean, having a microphone in front of my hand, no frickin' way, man. That was, like, absolutely not. I'm gonna run in the other direction if I even see a microphone. 

Rich Bennett 40:34
Well, yeah, speaking of microphone and correct me if I'm wrong, the podcast came before the book, right? 

Amy Dickens 40:43
The podcast came first. 

Rich Bennett 40:45
The podcast-- So, 

Amy Dickens 40:46
yeah. 

Rich Bennett 40:47
What made you decide to start the podcast? 

Amy Dickens 40:50
Well, you know, you just kind of get those gut feeling sometimes of-- Okay, I feel this weird feeling. And like about, you know, it's like two and a half years ago. I was like, I think I meant to, like, speak on stages. I was like, "I feel that." And I was like, "Ooh." And I was trying to do it, and I was like, "This is hard." And then I was 

Rich Bennett 41:07
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 41:07
trying to guest on other people's podcasts, and I don't know, it wasn't, like, when pod matching all of these things were really popularized yet. So I'm just, like, sending cold emails. And I was like, "Oh, my God. This is not working." And I wanted to just get good at doing this. I'm like, "How do I do that?" I guess I just start my own because nobody can tell me I can't do it. Like, I didn't just do it. And also, and then the beginning, I would edit the crap out of those episodes. Like, I was just doing solo episodes, and I was so nervous, and I would have to pause. And I'm like, "Oh, my God. What have I even talked to you about right now?" And I was like, "Was it even really having that much fun with it at first?" Because I was just so nervous. But then I started being like, "Oh, this is just fine. The more 

Rich Bennett 41:50
Right. 

Amy Dickens 41:50
the--." Do it. The more it stops being nerve-wracking. And you're like, "Oh, actually, I just need to be myself. I don't need to be perfect." And like, this idealized version of a podcast. I just need to be Amy for Ridicons and show up like that. Whatever comes out comes out. It doesn't have to be the most shiny, polished thing. But yeah, that's where it really started and kind of helped get me somewhere. Now I am, like, I got my first, like, paid speaking gig booked now. 

Rich Bennett 42:20
Nice. 

Amy Dickens 42:21
Things. And I'm like, "Oh, shit, that came! We did it!" For "Camp full circle," it took a couple years. But it finally landed! 

Rich Bennett 42:29
I just find it hard to believe that you were nervous doing the podcast. Because the first episode, you know, always listened to the first episode of the trailer and it sounds 

Amy Dickens 42:41
awesome. Really? 

Rich Bennett 42:41
Oh, yes. 

Amy Dickens 42:42
Have you gone? 

Yeah. You've got me doing the realies. 

dad, my dad also does stuff really. Yeah, I'm like, "Yes, what's 

Rich Bennett 42:52
My 

Amy Dickens 42:52
that?" Like, "Why are you saying it?" And I'm like, "Why do I keep saying it?" Of course, they said we were not even lying to me. 

Rich Bennett 42:58
No, it doesn't. It sounds great, which is very important because I mean, there are some podcasts I've listened to and just the voice. It's like, "Oh, no. I can't listen anymore." But you have the nice pleasant voice. You're right away when people start listening to your podcast, it just, to me, it will make them smile right away. It brightens them up because of the voice. And then when you get into the message, oh my god, then you just spread into the joinage. It's, to me, and those of you listening, if you go to joyful, was it joyfully you, right? 

Amy Dickens 43:44
Joyfully use the podcast. The website is live joyfully you. 

Rich Bennett 43:48
Okay. 

Amy Dickens 43:49
Joyfullyyou.com's aren't taken. 

Rich Bennett 43:51
those, those of you listening, if, to me and all honesty, if you want to start your morning off right after your regular morning routine, listen to joyfully you with Amy Dickens, of course. Because it just, it's gonna brighten up your day. It's gonna make your day goes so much better. You could get that motivation. That's me. that's 

Amy Dickens 44:14
Wow, 

Rich Bennett 44:14
what, that's the I feel 

Amy Dickens 44:17
that is the 

Rich Bennett 44:17
degree in with me. Are you disagreeing with me? 

Amy Dickens 44:22
serious? I'm not, I'm just shocked, I'm like what? That's the 

Rich Bennett 44:24
Hi, 

Amy Dickens 44:25
sweetest he has ever said. Come on! 

Rich Bennett 44:28
are 

Amy Dickens 44:28
Don't 

Rich Bennett 44:29
you 

Amy Dickens 44:29
be able to start your day. Yes, I'm serious. 

Rich Bennett 44:32
All the other podcasts you've been on it, they've never told you that. 

Amy Dickens 44:35
I mean, they say other sweet things, but not specifically. They say some things about me, but not about my podcast. 

Rich Bennett 44:42
No, I, now, if I can look, if I can listen to one episode and right away I want to listen to other episodes, that's a good podcast. 

Amy Dickens 44:52
Wow. 

Rich Bennett 44:52
So whatever you do, don't stop doing it. 

Amy Dickens 44:56
Thank you. 

Rich Bennett 44:57
Keep doing it. Because I know a lot of people get pod feed, and they'll just be like, yeah, no, I don't want to do it anymore. Or they look at the downloads, and they think, you know, because they have load downloads, they think they don't have listeners, which is bullshit because downloads don't equal listeners. 

Amy Dickens 45:16
So true. 

Rich Bennett 45:17
Yeah, and it's you, who you hosting through? 

Amy Dickens 45:23
Who I, I just switched it up recently. Am I trying to, which I post it through Buzzsprout. 

Rich Bennett 45:30
All right. So perfect. So Buzzsprout will show you the locations where people are list, or where it's downloaded. So if you take that and just look at those, where it's the locations, that is carried, or did people listening to it at and multiply that, you're getting your point across, which is very important. And yeah, don't, don't stop. 

Amy Dickens 45:55
stop. 

Rich Bennett 45:55
Don't 

Amy Dickens 45:55
Wow. 

Rich Bennett 45:56
Keep doing 

Amy Dickens 45:57
it. Take so much because I have definitely been in a little season of like, huh, do I want to keep doing this? 

Rich Bennett 46:02
Yes, you do. It isn't a lot of work. But here's, here's the other thing Amy how and I mean, you only got about 23 episodes at right? 

Amy Dickens 46:11
Something like that. 

Rich Bennett 46:13
So this, this 

Amy Dickens 46:14
Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 46:14
may not have happened yet, but I guarantee you keep doing it. It will. When a listener messages you, and thanks you for an episode, or how you've helped them have you hey. It's it's, it's rewarding. You can't beat it. So yeah, don't, don't stop. So with the book 101 ways to spread joy, 

what made you decide to write the book was it the podcast? Was it everything you went through? Was the combination of stuff or what? 

Amy Dickens 46:48
You know, um, so it was kind of after I'd already had this, you know, somewhat of a joy awakening, 

Rich Bennett 46:56
uh, mm-hmm. 

Amy Dickens 46:56
I had like a little season where life really slapped me down to the ground again and was like, Hey, here's another big break up. And here's a pile of health issues, no, you're stuck in your parents house because it's just like everything, you know, it's kind of where you feel like your whole life falls apart and you're on your knees like what is going on? How do I get out of this? And it felt like none of my other tools had been working because I was a certified coach and I, you know, I'm a yoga teacher and I'm the brick work and I am all the, I have all the things at this point. 

Rich Bennett 47:23
Right. 

Amy Dickens 47:23
Working right now. And I remember looking in the mirror and I said, Amy, something's got to change. We got to just try something new today. I don't know how we're going to get out of this. This is a serious funk right now. We're not looking so good right now. And so I gave myself a 30 day challenge and the 30 day challenge at first was wake up every single day and within the first, you know, like hour, do something that will spark joy in you again, because I realized 

Rich Bennett 47:48
I, but 

Amy Dickens 47:49
do not. And a few days in, I said, okay, today I'm going to write down on little pieces of paper, all the messages and the words that I need to hear right now in a really hard season of life and like, I don't know. I draw a little picture and I hid them around town and I put them in the library in the grocery store and then at the end, I was like hiding them in people's windshield wipers. I saw this 

Rich Bennett 48:12
I 

Amy Dickens 48:12
little 

Rich Bennett 48:12
love 

Amy Dickens 48:12
old, 

Rich Bennett 48:12
that 

Amy Dickens 48:12
honey, hot and stovering. She comes over and I'm sitting in the car and I'm seeing her. And I see her kind of I just said, Oh, cold, it's Chicago winter. It's freezing out. 

Rich Bennett 48:21
Right. 

Amy Dickens 48:22
and her whole being just lit up when she read this message. And I saw her just like, just totally changed. Like her whole state changed. And it lit something in me of, oh, that's what I'm doing with this challenge now is not just, yeah, okay, it is important to you. Like how do I get back to doing the things that Amy loves and sparking, joy and Amy? Well, how do I spread this around? And I was just doing that every day and figuring out new different ways to do that. And before the end of the 30 days, I was already in a completely different mental state. I had gotten kind of out of the funk enough that I literally moved my whole life back to Asheville and really put down roots and started building a community again 

Rich Bennett 49:03
Nice. 

Amy Dickens 49:03
and it was like, wow, and then time went on. And then I think a year and a half after that, I said, well, that was a thing that really helped me. Maybe I should write a book about that 'cause maybe if it helped me, it could help somebody else too. 

Rich Bennett 49:20
Mm-hmm. 

Amy Dickens 49:22
And so I just was like, and my friend had published the Ramosaw before, so 

Rich Bennett 49:26
of 

Amy Dickens 49:26
she like kind gave me the whole onesie two Z's, which I would highly recommend it. It's really accessible and I think really empowering. Like, there's just a book inside of everyone I think. 

Rich Bennett 49:35
Oh yeah. 

Amy Dickens 49:36
Daren, why not just write it out and share it with the world? And yeah, so I put it all together. It's got all kinds of rainbow pages and little chunks to make it really readable 'cause I was like, people often don't have time to read, so can you read it on the toilet or before bed? I think it's like somewhere where people are a lot of times these days with their reading time. 

Rich Bennett 49:59
(laughs) You're right! 

Amy Dickens 50:01
My only realist is here. And yeah, so it's got somewhat of my story in it. I have obviously like the list of ways to do it, the reasons why, if you're like, I need a little bit of science and reasoning, but why am I doing this? And just kind of like breaking it down, if you want to do a little book, to make it kind of a connective to spread joy together 'cause it can be kind of like scary for some reason to do some of these 

Rich Bennett 50:24
still-- 

Amy Dickens 50:24
things like I 

Rich Bennett 50:24
Right. 

Amy Dickens 50:25
Sometimes, wow, this is a little edgy and doing it with somebody else, it, oh, it's like the world expands of what feels possible sometimes. (laughs) We got somebody by your side doing something new, it's like, wow, this is a lot less scary with you here. But yeah, the whole point of it is really to help bring people to remembering that you can choose joy and that spreading joy in the world around you really does help uplift the world around you and uplift yourself in a huge way. And I really think that it's a huge way that we can change the world. There's a huge ripple effect that we're making every single day, whether we're angry or we're fearful or joyful or we're just peaceful and loving. Like every state that we're in can really make a ripple effect with every person we meet and we will never, ever, ever be able to fathom the impact that it's having on people. There's always, and so you're saying like with a podcast event, you know? 

Rich Bennett 51:23
Yeah, 

Amy Dickens 51:23
And just like, never know who has been impacted by 

Rich Bennett 51:28
yeah. 

Amy Dickens 51:28
somebody for better or worse. So why not choose for better? Because I really think that that's often in this crazy times that we're living in with the world, you know, where ever you stand on things and things are really shaken up. And when you zoom out so much, it's overwhelming but zoom into your community. And suddenly the world feels like I can make a difference and this can change the world because it can change the world on my block or whatever it might be, you know? And that makes a difference that matters. 

Rich Bennett 51:55
So what's one of your favorites? I wanna say one of your, well for the listeners, what's one of your favorite simple, 

Amy Dickens 52:03
(laughing) 

Rich Bennett 52:03
is it from the book? 

Amy Dickens 52:06
Yeah, I mean, my personal favorite is definitely a joy parade. But like, 

Rich Bennett 52:10
Okay. 

Amy Dickens 52:11
I don't think that the average bear is gonna go out on the streets with like a speaker 

Rich Bennett 52:16
I'm 

Amy Dickens 52:17
and like, (laughing) and get with her people to dance. I'm like, I recognize that that's like probably a unique (laughing)

Rich Bennett 52:23
All right, let's do it this way then. Give me three rapid-fire joy sparks that listeners can try this week. 

Amy Dickens 52:30
I love it. I love it. I mean, I think the living little messages around town that's, 

Rich Bennett 52:37
I love 

Amy Dickens 52:38
that. 

It's so fun. One of the favorite ones that I did, me and a friend, we wrote down sweet little messages on Post-It and for some reason, we were terrified doing this but it was really sweet. And we put them on people's backs in the grocery store and we're like, why are we so scared to put like happy messages on people's backs? And we were 

Rich Bennett 52:56
'Cause 

Amy Dickens 52:56
like, 

Rich Bennett 52:56
a lot of people think you're putting on kick me. 

Amy Dickens 52:59
(laughing) Right, right, and then they'd like look at and they'd be like, oh my God, this is sweet. And then this woman came up to us. She was with like her husband or something and she was like, oh my God, that literally made his whole week. He just like got evicted from his home and like it's been having--

Rich Bennett 53:14
Oh, 

Amy Dickens 53:14
the worst day. And I don't remember exactly what it was that we had written on the poster. No, but it was something that was like eerily perfect for 

Rich Bennett 53:23
yeah. 

Amy Dickens 53:23
that man in this like horrible worst week of his life kind of thing that he was going through. And one of those like, whoa, I like it was almost too perfect of I don't even know, but that was exactly what he needed to hear. And it was like so perfect that we got to just kind of be that little uplifting. Because sometimes 

Rich Bennett 53:40
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 53:40
it's all someone to need. Sometimes just need that little like tiny silly message to keep them going through the hardest time in their life and 

Rich Bennett 53:49
"Were 

Amy Dickens 53:50
saying, 

Rich Bennett 53:50
even a simple smile?" 

Amy Dickens 53:51
yeah, even a simple smile. I was just that's so true. I was driving downtown Asheville the other day. And this woman was beaming the biggest smile as she's crossing the street while I'm sitting at the red light. And I couldn't help but just have like this cheesy smile myself and I'm like, "Wow, joy really is contagious!" 

Rich Bennett 54:13
It is! 

Amy Dickens 54:14
It really is, wow! 

Rich Bennett 54:17
All right, so what's the other two? You need? 

Amy Dickens 54:21
Okay, 

Rich Bennett 54:21
two. The 

Amy Dickens 54:21
other 

Rich Bennett 54:22
other two. 

Amy Dickens 54:23
We got the Posteds. We got let's see, what's the other two? You know, I think... I mean, I'm trying to think of what the other two you know. 

Rich Bennett 54:34
A wig and dance. 

Amy Dickens 54:36
I think getting people together is a really great, like, just gathering people in your community. I think that we forget that we can reach out to people and just say, "Let's get together." And just like share gratitude and like whatever it is that you want to do. You want to have like a potluck or you just want to like hang out or you want to 

Rich Bennett 54:58
be a real neighbor. 

Amy Dickens 54:59
Yeah. Whatever it is, just gather people together. We're like way too freaking 

Rich Bennett 55:05
right? 

Amy Dickens 55:05
isolated, It's really... That's just the truth of it. Oh, another favorite one of mine is appreciating people. Like just the people in your phone, even like this thing that we're constantly connected to all the time. You can pick it up in the morning, and you can text someone, you can call someone, or you can leave a voice note of what you appreciate. Like you can do one person, you can do three people every day. And it takes less than 60 seconds. Like if you're just going to send one person like, wow, like a deep heartfelt. Not like, "Oh, you have a great smile." Like really... Really something that you're like, actually, I really love this thing about you and let them hear the truth of that in your voice. And it really can spark someone's day in a way 

Rich Bennett 55:53
Yeah. 

Amy Dickens 55:53
that you don't even know. And it feels so good to give in that kind of way. 

Rich Bennett 55:57
All right, so if someone feels stuck in fear right now, what would you, what would you gently say to them as if you could say anything harsh? 

Amy Dickens 56:10
I can be harsh. My friends say I can be savage sometimes. That's what they call me, like, "Amy, wow, that was a little savage." But like, you're like a little less girl. So it's super goofful. So it's not quite as like cutting against maybe somebody else would say. Wow, I mean, if somebody is really stuck in fear, and I want to say, I still have moments where I am stuck in fear. I 

Rich Bennett 56:31
Yeah, 

Amy Dickens 56:31
just want to always humanize myself because I find that people sometimes pedestal me and think like, wow, she's got it all figured out. And she never gets fearful. And she's like completely confident. A hundred percent of the time when I'm still a human freaking being and just doing my best to walk with the fear. But you are so much more capable than anything you ever thought possible, I think. It's really, like in the fear, it doesn't mean that you're wrong. It doesn't mean that 

Rich Bennett 57:00
there. 

Amy Dickens 57:01
you're walking in the wrong direction. It doesn't mean that you're incapable. It doesn't mean any, it doesn't really mean anything. And you get to choose what meaning you give things, which is a total game changer. When you realize that we are constantly making meaning about what everything means. And when you can start to just understand this is this fear, I can make it mean that I'm not meant to do this. That I am an impostor, that I am incapable, whatever your story is. Or you could say, okay, this fear means that this actually means a lot to me. This fear means that, oh, I care a lot about this and that I get to kind of let this fear walk with me, but I don't let it in the driver seat anymore. I'm in the driver seat, saying, alright, this is where we're going. You can be in the back seat, and you can have your seat belt on, but we're going. And you know, kind of being kind to it, not necessarily like, whatcha, we're going with you, like it or like I'm busted down the door. I'm like, no, you look be kind to yourself because you don't want to wreck your freaking nervous system. I've done that too. That's why I say that part. 

Rich Bennett 58:06
Oh man, God, I could sit down with you and I know I'd have a blast all day. 

Amy Dickens 58:15
oh me too 

Rich Bennett 58:15
I'm like oh my 

Amy Dickens 58:17
god five I really like talking to 

Rich Bennett 58:18
you see if you ever come up the Maryland now have to show you what true steam crabs are all about 

Amy Dickens 58:24
I have a very good friend that is up in Maryland and I have yet to meet his baby so it's a 

Rich Bennett 58:30
we're about 

Amy Dickens 58:31
know 

Rich Bennett 58:31
do you 

Amy Dickens 58:32
um I think he's I think he's outside of Baltimore 

Rich Bennett 58:37
so am I there you go see 

Amy Dickens 58:39
no way 

Rich Bennett 58:40
right right on just big bay yeah 

Amy Dickens 58:43
oh let's go 

Rich Bennett 58:45
all right so Amy is there anything you would like to add before I get to my last 

Amy Dickens 58:50
question wow no I mean we're covering it all like these people oh I'm just like I'm just excited to really spark some joy in these people 

Rich Bennett 59:01
oh I want to have you on again 

Amy Dickens 59:04
oh please I would love to be on again 

Rich Bennett 59:06
well 

Amy Dickens 59:07
anytime 

Rich Bennett 59:07
you got to another book you have to write like a memoir 

Amy Dickens 59:12
it's funny you say that that was the first I this is the fifth book that I've ever tried like 

Rich Bennett 59:18
oh 

Amy Dickens 59:18
started writing 

Rich Bennett 59:19
okay 

Amy Dickens 59:20
one that I finished I will say and one in the one before this was a memoir that I was writing um but the editing on it I was like wow this is time 

Rich Bennett 59:32
that's 

Amy Dickens 59:33
and what 

Rich Bennett 59:35
you send out advance reader copies first and then it makes the editing a lot 

Amy Dickens 59:41
easier you're genius did anyone ever tell you that 

Rich Bennett 59:44
oh no all right so pick a between one and five 

four all right now pick a number between one and twenty 

Amy Dickens 1:00:02
I this feels like we're doing um you know those little paper then you like hold up the thing 

Rich Bennett 1:00:08
well I want to see how good I want to see how good you are because a lot of the times whatever question this comes to aligns with what we've been talking about so 

Amy Dickens 1:00:19
I love this okay he said one in twenty 

Rich Bennett 1:00:22
yeah twelve twelve all right 

oh 

you see wow 

Amy Dickens 1:00:35
what 

Rich Bennett 1:00:35
it 

Amy Dickens 1:00:36
is 

Rich Bennett 1:00:36
what is it I'm telling you it's so how I thought is this is no all right so those of you listening I have a hundred questions and I have them categorized in five different categories that's why yes the listener to pick a number between one and five or then whatever number they pick there's certain questions in that so and she picked number 12 this is funny as hell what is a memory you often revisit that brings you joy or comfort 

Amy Dickens 1:01:06
no are you kidding me? not kidding you no freaking way out of a hundred questions we got one about joy 

wow okay wait I also like laughed over a part of what you said it was 

Rich Bennett 1:01:23
oh what's a memory you often yeah what's a memory you off the revisit that brings you joy or comfort 

Amy Dickens 1:01:29
oh my god that's freaking so funny I can't even I can't even oh okay a memory out often revisit that gives me joy and comfort I mean gosh there are so many I'm trying to like pick just one 

the one the one that's coming up right now is for uh my birthday this past year I have a group of close friends 

Rich Bennett 1:02:05
okay 

Amy Dickens 1:02:05
and for each other's birthday we all like the everyone we'd tell them okay this is what I want for my birthday and everybody else would like make that happen and I just told them I want to get messy I want to have a lot of fun and I want to play games and so I showed and they made a what would you even call it I guess like an obstacle course and there's like blue and purple spaghetti everywhere and you're like having to be like potato sack stop and they're like throwing sponges with like paint on you and you're like crawling through like your army crawling through different tubes or like water like in the end there's the and this is like all a relay race that we're like timing ourselves to like five teams so that we like finish the fastest whoever wins you know I don't know I'll just 

Rich Bennett 1:02:54
wins 

Amy Dickens 1:02:55
bringing rights I guess but at the end 

at the end you took a five gallon bucket of homemade slime and you're just like poor it all over yourself and I loved it and then we had just like a food fight at the end and it was just freaking so fun I there's something I just love about like food fight messy time for some reason I don't know I'm just laughing really hard with people that I love and it's so close to it was very fun and it was just it was very sweet 

Rich Bennett 1:03:28
so those of you listening if you haven't gotten any idea yet Amy and I think the same thing and I'm going to say that loud no matter how old you get we're always kids at heart have fun man have fun it doesn't matter how old you are just have fun you can be a kid and I I see it year as Santa it's amazing how many adults come and sit on my lap 

Amy Dickens 1:03:57
I love 

Rich Bennett 1:03:58
that so yeah don't don't yeah age is nothing but 

Amy Dickens 1:04:03
from Santa himself 

Rich Bennett 1:04:04
a number 

Amy Dickens 1:04:05
ladies and gentlemen never grow up 

Rich Bennett 1:04:10
Amy thank you so much I had a blast and like I said the doors are the doors open anytime you want to come back on it's 

Amy Dickens 1:04:20
my love 

Rich Bennett 1:04:21
that God yeah now I got these of you listening you know what I'm going to say when you purchase Amy's book 100 ways to spread joy after you read it make sure you leave a full review whether beyond Amazon but wherever you can get the book wherever you can leave reviews and then purchase copies for other people because you don't want to pass it on to somebody else you want to leave it in the bathroom or next to your bed because her next book is gonna be 365 ways to spread joy do you love the fact that I'm giving you homework 

Amy Dickens 1:04:57
I love and it you're like Amy you got work to do 

Rich Bennett 1:05:01
you think like daily motivationals it's like daily motivationals we'll call them daily 365 daily Amy vision knows or something like that 

Amy Dickens 1:05:14
I love it these five days of joy it's coming 

Rich Bennett 1:05:18
Amy thanks so much 

Amy Dickens 1:05:20
thank you so much rich I have had such a blast have laughed so much this has been so too delight I love this 

Rich Bennett 1:05:30
I gotta go get a wig now 

Amy Dickens 1:05:33
maybe for the next episode let's wear wigs I know that nobody will ever see the video but we will see the video 

Rich Bennett 1:05:38
oh you know what for that I I would definitely I would have yeah I would I would put the 

Amy Dickens 1:05:44
that 

Rich Bennett 1:05:45
video for

Amy Dickens 1:05:46
yeah or if I ever show up in Maryland I'm gonna show up with two matching wigs

Rich Bennett 1:05:51
you know one of the things that really stuck with me in this conversation is that joy isn't something we wait for it's not something we earn after we've checked all of the boxes or fixed everything in our lives it's something we choose in small moments in uncomfortable moments sometimes even in the middle of fear what I love about what Amy is doing she's reminding people that it's okay to feel alive again to laugh a little louder to move a little more freely to maybe even dance when it feels a little awkward or a little scary because that's where growth happens and for everyone listening maybe the takeaway isn't to go sell everything and start van life tomorrow but maybe it's this what's one small way you can choose joy today not tomorrow not when things calm down but today because like Amy said that ripple effect is real and you never know who you're going to impact just by showing up a little more fully as yourself Amy thank you so much for coming on and sharing your story your energy and honestly your joy this was definitely a lot of fun make sure you check out her book 101 ways to spread joy and connect with her all the links are in the notes and to everyone listening if this episode made you think made you smile or maybe even pushed you a little outside your comfort zone share it with someone who needs it leave a comment reach out to me let me know your biggest takeaway I always love hearing from you and until next time keep spread enjoy keep showing up as yourself and keep the conversations going